Cosmic Karma: How The Mice Got the Better of Me and How it Applies to Writing

I live in an old house. A very old, lovingly semi-restored (we're working on it! :-)) house. What that means is this: lots of problems pop up with little or no warning and there are often few solutions. It is what it is:  OLD.

My house is bordered on three sides with agricultural land. When the farmers harvested their peanuts this year, a contigent of homeless mice decided to move into my house. Mr Husband and I searched out  and repaired dozens of holes, cracks and other places where a mouse could potentially slip through undetected. We screened all the vents, put that weird foam around all the pipes, and still the little boogers got into the house. My paranoia and frustration increased exponentially every twenty-four hours.

After about a week of this, I started saying, "I wish I could just line them up and hit them with a hammer."

I should NOT have said that. Carrie told me I should NOT say that. But I did. Repeatedly.

On Sunday afternoon I dropped a two-pound hammer, from counter height, on my foot. I was barefoot. OUCH. In all likelihood, Mr Husband learned some new vocabulary words.

It occured to me, sometime late Sunday night, when my foot was roughly the size of watermelon, and I was swearing the injury hurt more than childbirth, that we have to be careful what we say and what we visualize. I jinxed myself. I saw one solution to the rodent problem:  paranoia-driven violence.

Here's how it applies to writing:
If you have a hole in your manuscript a mile wide, and you say, "There's only one way to fix it." You don't listen to anyone else's input. You don't give your brain time to sift through possibillities. Instead you rush to fix it your way and you end up making things much worse.

On the other hand, if you say, "I know I have this hole, and it needs to be fixed. What are the possible solutions?" The solutions will begin to trickle into your brain. You listen to others, read books that are similar to yours and assimilate all the ideas. Then, after careful consideration, you fix it and it's perfect.

I should have listened to Mr Husband who said, "Let's shore up all the holes, trap them with those humane traps and release them in the woods where they'll have food and cover." (Did I mention he has some genius moments?) But I didn't. The reason the hammer fell on my foot was because I left it on the counter, just in case, instead of in the cabinet where it belongs.

So here's my advice: Think smart. Be careful what images you load into your brain. And be careful where you leave your hammer.

BTW, the foot is going to be fine. There are no longer any mice in my house. And none of them came to a violent end via hammer.

I Don't Wanna

Today was one of those days where nothing seems to get done. On top of that, I just didn't feel like writing. Have you ever had one of those days? Not a writer's block day, but a day where the thought of putting your words down on paper or on a computer screen just isn't appealing.

I've actually spent a week with this feeling. Autumn is my favorite season, and the outside world is calling.

I'm counting on the fact that many of you know what I'm talking about. So, in the spirit of my mood, I'm going to share some tips on how to write on those days where the world, people, or things are easy distractions.

1. BIC - In case you've never seen this acronym, it stands for Butt in Chair. The best way to handle this mood is to just park it and start working. This is easier said than done. The majority of working people in the world do this every single day ... because there is someone that they must answer to. As writers, we don't have that special someone to track our actions, but we can behave like a boss is watching. Set yourself a regular schedule and follow it every day. Research indicates that it takes an average of 21 days to make something a habit, so if you do this for at least 3 weeks, you should be able to overcome the "I don't feel like it" mood.

2. Review - If you can't bring yourself to write, then print out what you've been working on and read over it. Take your favorite red (or blue, or green, or purple) pen and mark it up.

3. Revise - Look at your last few pages and start revising. Odds are, you will end up writing once you get beyond those pages. The key is to not get stuck in revision mode. Some people start revising and months later haven't written anything new. So exercise this tip with caution.

4. Research - Pick a topic from your manuscript and dig deeper. This will help you give your work flavor. Google it, go to the library or the bookstore, visit a museum, or talk to an expert. New information can inspire you and drive you back to the keyboard.

5. Rejuvenate - Sometimes on days that we don't feel like writing, we need to relax. Go somewhere where you can soak up the environment, people watch, or just be.

6. Read - This is like research, but from a different angle. Read books in your genre focusing on how the author handles issues that you may be dealing with.

Well, there it is. I didn't plan it, but it spells "Brrrrr." I guess that's because if we don't write, then our work will never see the light of day.

What ways do you fight the "I don't wanna" days?

Guest Blogger: Jackie K. Cooper

Today, we're joined by Jackie K. Cooper. He will be on faculty at the 2009 South Carolina Writers' Workshop Conference.

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WHY I WRITE

Over the past few years I have been asked over and over again as to why I write. Well the answer is that I write with the hope someone will read what I have written and will get something from it – be it a laugh, a tear, or a thought. Now how do people get the books I write? Hopefully some people will go to their local book store and purchase copies. Others may just go to their local libraries and check them out.

If they do go to their libraries they had better check the hours of operation because most of them in my state, Georgia, have changed. It is called economics, or more specifically a money shortfall. There is not enough money to keep the libraries open the regular hours so they are being cut back.

The libraries are also having to cut back on staff. Some of have gotten rid of people manning the desks while others have gotten rid of those people who shelve the books. And there may be worse cuts to come.

I love libraries, always have and always will. When I was growing up in Clinton, South Carolina the children’s librarian was Miss Gray. She was really Mrs. Gray in her everyday life but in the library she was Miss Gray.Miss Gray had a wonderfully lyrical voice and when she read us stories the world came alive to us. She did this every Wednesday afternoon and all of us kids looked forward to it. After she read she would spend time with each child finding him/her a special book to check out. She was amazing in knowing what each of us wanted to read.

Years later when I joined the Air Force I was assigned to Robins Air Force Base in Georgia. One of the first places I looked up was the Base Library. There I met the librarian, Mrs. Jarman, and we became great friends. Mrs. Jarman was a voracious reader and she and I could discuss books until the cows came home.

After I married and moved to Perry, Georgia I met Alice Gilbert, the local librarian. Alice knew more about books and authors than I could imagine. She was a walking encyclopedia about them. If you mentioned an author you liked, well she could mention five more that you might be interested in reading. And if you didn’t like those five, then she could add another five to your list.

Recently I heard from a friend of mine who works for the library system in Gwinnett County. I was supposed to teach a writing class as part of the adult programming at the library. He said that due to a lack of funds the adult programming he had planned was cancelled. Then he added that the Gwinnett Reading Festival was also canceled.

The Gwinnett County Reading Festival had been in existence for two years and was getting better each year. The authors who attended got a chance to meet and mingle with the people of Gwinnett County who love to read. I had been both years and had a great time. It also gave me a chance to meet Carmen Deedy, Rick Bragg and other authors I admire.

Why is it when money gets tight the Arts are the first to suffer? It seems this world is considered the most expendable. It isn’t right. It just isn’t right.

I dreamed one day of writing books that people would read. The dream came true but now it is in danger. Authors need libraries; kids need libraries; the world needs libraries.

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Jackie K. Cooper was born in South Carolina and now lives in Georgia. He is the married father of two sons and the proud grandparent of a boy and two girlsHe is familiar to people living in the middle Georgia area as the "entertainment man" since his entertainment reviews run in newspapers and are shown on television there. His short stories have been used as commentary on Georgia Public Radio. He also keeps active appearing as an after dinner speaker for various events.Cooper has lived an exceptionally interesting life and portions of it were contained in his first book "JOURNEY OF A GENTLE SOUTHERN MAN". The journey continued in "CHANCES AND CHOICES". His third book "HALFWAY HOME" was published by Mercer University Press in October 2004. His fourth book THE BOOK BINDER was published in the fall of 2006. His latest collection of stories is titled THE SUNRISE REMEMBERS which was also published by Mercer University Press. Check out his website at www.jackiekcooper.com.

Show me the Money! or Why Are You a Writer?

Why ARE you a writer? If it's for one of the following reasons, you're in the wrong business.

1. "One bestseller, along with a movie deal, will make me so rich I'll never have to work again."
2. "I'll be famous and people will adore me!"
3. "Writing a book is easy. All I have to do once I get published is travel the world, on my publisher's dime, and sign books."
4. "I need an extra income and this is the easiest way to do it."

I'm going to explain why each of the above could be the kiss of death.
1. One bestseller likely means years and years of non-bestsellers, novels that don't sell, and query letters that go nowhere. Most authors are in the business for a long time before NYT even notices them. Take Debbie Macomber or Nora Roberts. Both wrote category romance for a decade or more before a single title went to the top of the NYT Bestseller list. Sure, they're perennials now, but that wasn't always the case. And unfortunately, a movie deal is not included in the sale of a book. It's a la carte and depending on what you write, it may never happen. Publishers depend on bestselling authors to keep writing. One book won't cut it.

2. Okay, so people may adore you, but not because you're instantly recognizable like Paris Hilton or Michelle Obama. Yes, once you're published, people will look at your dust jacket and see your photo. But few authors look like their "book photo." Also consider that movies are visual. So are politics. Writing is still two-dimensional. When is the last time you saw an author playing the heroine in a movie based on her book? Consider this---A friend of mine, an NYT Bestselling author of suspense novels, sells a book in the US every six seconds. (He's in about a billion other countries, too.) According to him, he's been recognized exactly twice outside a signing or a conference or other place where people were expecting him. One of those occasions was on a flight to Australia. His neighbor was reading one of his hardbacks with the huge photo. After a few hours, he recognized the author. You know this author's name; you think you would recognize him. But you likely wouldn't.

3. Writing a book---any book---IS NOT EASY. Every step is a challenge. Most people who successfully transition from writer to author do it in years---not in days or weeks or months. Yes, I know, there are books and DVDs that promise you can write a book in thirty days. Maybe you can. But can you polish it, revise it, AND sell it in thirty days? Not likely. Unless you're a celebrity or a wronged political wife---that package comes with a ghostwriter. As for traveling the world, most authors have a tight marketing budget. Unless you're Nora Roberts or Dean Koontz, your publisher will not pay for frequent trip to Monaco or Bali. You'll be stuck in your office, typing away, trying to meet your next deadline. Books make money for publishers. An author sucking down Sangria in Barcelona does not. You have to make time to actually write books if you want to keep your publisher. And your agent.

4. If you need extra income, writing isn't necessarily the best way to get it. If you have experience you can possibly get work with a local newspaper or an online magazine, but becoming a novelist when you've been a banker or a nurse requires you learn a host of new skills. The learning curve is steep and the skills needed to write and sell a novel take years to acquire. It takes four or more years to get a Bachelors. It will likely take at least that long to make a splash in publishing. Don't kid yourself---if you're in dire straits financially, do something more concrete. Avon or eBay. Don't put yourself into a deeper bind by thinking this is something you can accomplish in a weekend.